Live To Express, Not To Impress

If you want to change your life but you hesitate because you're afraid you'll fail or look stupid, because people may laugh at you when you make a mistake, because you believe people who make fun of you may know you better than you know yourself, because all your fumbling and stumbling may prove them right or because you believe to be successful you have to change the minds of everybody who judged or criticized you in the past, or even that you have to prove to them that you're worthy of success, then keep reading, this is for you...

If you can identify with anything I've said, let me burst your bubble because you need a reality check. No offense, but you've been living a lie all these years. You were deceived by people who let you believe they have power over you, that you can't be successful unless they like you and agree with everything you do. If you believe that, you are as wrong about them as they are about you. You don't need their approval to be successful, you don't have to prove anything to anybody, and best of all, you don't have to waste time trying to impress them at all.  Know why? Because they're not your standard, that's why. They never were, and never will be.

Truth is, all those people who made fun of your uniqueness are envious of you. Why do I say this? Because you have the guts to risk failure to make your life better, and they don't. They wish they had your courage, but are too scared (and too proud) to admit it. They won't ask you for help, because they don't want to "lower" themselves to your level. If they were smart, they'd let you offer them a hand UP, instead of looking for the quick fix of a hand OUT which keeps them stuck in their mess, blaming you and everyone else for the misery they created for themselves. They hope nobody finds out how scared they are to fail, so they take the "safe" route and ridicule your efforts, hoping that you don't see behind the facade they've put up, trying to fool everyone around them into believing they are braver than they really are. Sort of like this:

You see, anybody can criticize. It takes no courage to mock, to ridicule, to second guess. Anyone with half a brain can do that. It takes courage to stand out from the crowd, to be different, to dare lay hold of the mighty when it would be so much easier to latch onto the mediocre.  Everything about challenge arouses the senses, engages all the faculties of your being. About comfort and convenience, nothing of the sort comes even close.

"It is not the critic who counts, not the one who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred with dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly, who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who actually does strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions, who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly...far better is it to dare mighty things, to win glorious triumphs, even though checkered by failure...than to rank with those poor spirits who neither enjoy nor suffer much, because they live in that grey twilight that knows neither victory nor defeat." - Theodore Roosevelt

You will never win somebody over who is determined to find something about you they don't like. It's okay, you don't have to win them over, you don't have to convince them to like you, or recognize your uniqueness. As the saying goes, different strokes for different folks. Maybe you aren't their cup of tea, but so what? One man's trash is another man's treasure. If some people don't understand your motives for wanting success, it doesn't matter. What does matter is that you understand your motives, and you will meet people during your journey that can appreciate them, too. There are people in your life who can't go with you on your success journey, not because you refuse to take them along, but because they don't want to go. Let them go. They are not entitled to go with you, and you're not obligated to invite them along. Truth be told, they're not meant to go with you; they'll only hold you back.

Finally I'll say this: whatever you choose to do with your life, remember that is truly is YOUR life. It doesn't belong to someone else, it belongs to you. Your life should be an expression of who you really are. It is not your mission to walk the days allotted to you on this earth as the embodiment of somebody else. To copy someone else is to waste who you truly are...and you cheat the people who walk this earth alongside you out of a chance to experience the greatness you hold within. Whether it's your personal life, your business life, your career, or any other part of your life when you have the opportunity to make a positive impact in the lives of others, they deserve nothing less than your best. Make sure they get it. And if someone in your midst doesn't like the way you sing your song, tough. Too bad. It sucks to be them, because they can't appreciate you. You bring a style, a seasoning to the dish called life that nobody else can bring. Dare to bring it, and when the critics start wagging their tongues think of this:

"Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life. Don't be trapped by dogma - which is living with the results of someone else's thinking. Don't let the noise of others' opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition." - Steve Jobs

"Let others lead small lives, but not you. Let others argue over small things, but not you. Let others cry over small things, but not you. Let others leave their future in someone else's hands, but not you." - Jim Rohn

That's all for now, gotta run.  Until we meet again, remember...

Keep it simple...See ya!

Don't Be a Drama Donor

"A cheerful disposition is good for your health, gloom and doom leave you bone-tired." - Proverbs 17:22 The Message Bible

DRAMA QUEEN: a person (especially a woman) who acts as though things are much worse than they really are; a person given to often excessively emotional performances or reactions

If there any people in your life who always cry the blues, sing "nobody knows the trouble I've seen," boohoo so much you'd think they bought (or should have bought) all the stock in Kleenex...

You just might know a DRAMA QUEEN...

If there are people in your life who always see themselves as the victim, no matter what happens in their lives, good, bad, or indifferent...

You just might know a DRAMA QUEEN...

If you know someone who sees every situation as a crisis, who always believes "the sky is falling," who always imagines the worst, who could have given lessons to Chicken Little...

You just might know a DRAMA QUEEN... AND FINALLY...

If you know somebody who can take any situation, no matter how big or small it is, that has nothing to do with them, and somehow make it seem like the situation is all about them and only them...

Congratulations...you definitely know a DRAMA QUEEN...

I'll just tell you point blank: if you tolerate having a DQ in your life, you'd better get ready to be drained dry. DQ's are emotional vampires, they never know when to stop draining your energy, and will take it all from you if you let them do it. They see themselves as victims, helpless and powerless. No matter what happens in their lives, they had nothing to do with causing the trouble; it's ALWAYS someone else's fault.  They think you should solve their problems, so they put the weight of their world on your shoulders because they expect you to carry it for them. After all, they're "entitled" to get their problems fixed, and you're "obligated" to fix them. Someone else made the mess, so someone else should clean it up, as far as they're concerned. In their minds people exist to make them happy; they assume no responsibility for creating their own happiness. And if they ever do something for you there's an ulterior motive; they want to manipulate you into giving them pats on the back. They get a big kick out of playing the martyr: supposedly sacrificing for your benefit but doing so in a way that ultimately makes you feel guilty about how they bent over backwards to help you.

Just to be clear, when I talk about playing the victim, I'm don't refer to people who have been wounded or traumatized physically, emotionally, mentally, or any other way, people who have experienced genuine loss. Such people need as much love and support as they can get, as often as they can get it. I'm talking about people who overreact to every slight, real or imagined, people who see in every situation a major crisis, in every molehill a mountain, in every anthill an Antarctica. The world revolves around them and their feelings, they have an overactive imagination, and they're sure everybody is out to get them, secretly plotting their demise. These are the people who believe their life should matter more to you than anyone else's (including your own). They feel as if they are entitled to take up all your time, and you are obligated to give them all your attention. They are offended, even outraged, if they catch you doing something that does not involve devoting your entire being to ensure their happiness. They want you to stop everything you're and notice them, because in their minds they have to be the center of attention, all the time. They say, "drop that and come here, I need you to do this for me" so often it should trademark it as their own personal catchphrase. In the words of George Bernard Shaw, they are a "selfish little clod of ailments and grievances wondering why the world won't devote itself to making [them] happy."

If you find yourself sucking up to people like this, and you can identify with just about everything I've said here, and you realize you need to make some changes but don't know what to do, let me offer you some advice that will help:

STOP.  JUST DO IT. NOW.

Yes, you read that right. Put a stop to all this madness. It's exhausting, it's draining, and it doesn't do you or them any good at all. These emotional vampires will suck every last ounce of strength from your body if you let them. They don't care if they take it all your energy, or even to pay your last respects if all their drama kills you. They'd seek someone else to feed on, just like a parasite seeks a host. Get the picture?

Face it, you're a donor at their drama bank.  You volunteered for duty and didn't know it. Every time they call, you come running, ready for them to stick the needle in your arm all over again. You put up with their tantrums because they're "family," they're "friends," you guys are really close, "...you know I'd do anything for you..", or whatever line of bull they fed you over the years to manipulate you into doing their bidding.  Reality check time: your relationship with them has been and will forever be one-sided. It's never about you, it's about them, always has been and always will be. Like fishermen say, it's time to cut bait, the sooner the better. Don't waste time feeling guilty about it. If you want to take care of others, at some point you have to include yourself. DQ's might not see it that way, but we're not talking about them this time...we're talking about YOU. Stop going to their pity parties. Send the guest of honor your apologies, but not your regrets. They won't shape up, so ship them out. They're takers, plain and simple, and you need to cut them loose. Love them from a distance if you have to, but do it. Like now...like yesterday.

"Givers have to set limits because takers rarely do." - Henry Ford

For your health and for your sanity, let them go. Do whatever it takes to make a clean break. It may hurt for a minute, but sometimes you need to hurt in the short term to get healed in the long run.

There is nothing wrong with volunteering at a blood bank. I've done it myself a few times. It is selfless, it is honorable, it is a noble deed to give a part of yourself so that someone else can have a chance at life. There is nothing the least bit honorable about letting anyone suck the very life out of you until there's nothing left at all. Doing so doesn't help you or anyone else. Don't let anyone talk you into becoming a martyr so they can keep playing the victim. Stop worshiping at the throne of the Drama Queen. Kick them off the throne and seize their crown; they have no right to rule your life.

Let them fuss, holler, kick and scream all they want, it makes no difference. You gave your power away, and you can take it back. Spend your precious life, and your valuable time with people who love you most, and appreciate you best. Let them celebrate you as much as you celebrate them.

The sooner you do, the sooner you'll be:

That's all y'all, gotta run... Until we meet again, remember:

Keep it simple....See ya!

Build Relationships The Kool-Aid Way

"But the wisdom from above is first of all pure (undefiled); then it is peace-loving, courteous (considerate, gentle). [It is willing to] yield to reason, full of compassion and good fruits; it is wholehearted and straightforward, impartial and unfeigned (free from doubts, wavering, and insincerity)." - James 3:17 AMP

Thinking of Kool Aid reminds me of my favorite time of year...SUMMERTIME!

If you have kids, or grandkids, or even if you just remember what it was like to be a kid, you know that part of the fun of summer is having something fun to drink. When I was growing up it was usually Kool Aid or iced tea, or sometimes lemonade. Now you may have kids of your own, and you're the one they run to when they're thirsty. You're the one holding the pitcher, filling the cups or glasses held by eager little hands to help them cool off from working up a good sweat in the hot sun. It makes perfect sense that you give them as much (or as little) as they can handle at one time, so they can drink until they're satisfied. And when they're done, they'll say one of two things:

"Thank you," hand you the cup, run along and play, or

"Thank you, can I have some more?"

Not hard to figure out, right? They're kids, that's what they do, that's how they roll. Now let me ask you something. If your child asked you for some Kool Aid, would you dump the the whole pitcher on their little head? Of course you wouldn't! NOBODY in their right mind would do that to their child, or anybody else's child, for that matter. You might scare them, upset them, overwhelm them.  They'd run from you, avoid you like the plague, and they wouldn't want to be around you very much because they feel like they can't trust you. (And don't get me started on what would happen if their parents found out what you did...do I really need to state the obvious?)

Now lest you think this applies only to children, you need to realize something: as we grow older this mindset does not change. People are willing to see only as much as they can handle at any given time. It's as true for personal relationships as it is for business. Put another way, people won't drink water through a fire hose when a simple straw will do the trick just fine. And just like Kool Aid, when you let people see who you are or what you do, they will respond in one of two ways:

"Thanks, but I'm not interested," 

or 

"Thank you, can you tell me more about yourself (or your business)?"

By the way, have you noticed when you offer Kool-Aid to a child, you don't have to convince them to drink it?  They already like it: the bright color, the cold sensation over ice, the sweet taste on their tongue. It's rare that children say no to Kool-Aid, and even if they do, there's no reason to get upset about it. Why talk them into it when there are plenty of kids around who already like it? Just offer it to the ones who want it...if they say no, you say NEXT!  Don't take it personal, no need to be offended. It's like water off a duck's back. No big deal.

Long story short, you or your business are just like Kool-Aid: bright, colorful, attractive, fun to have around or be around. Offer who you are and what you have to people who may like what you bring to the table, but only give them as much as they can handle. Serve a little at a time. Don't dump everything on them at once; don't force yourself on them. Serve them through a cup or a glass, use a straw if you have to. You don't have to overwhelm them with T.M.I. (Too Much Information), which can frighten or discourage them. Make the process as easy as possible. Give them enough to satisfy their curiosity, and when they're finished, one way or another, make sure that as you part company, they leave with a good taste in their mouths.

And if you can do that, maybe the people you meet will look forward to seeing you just as much as the kids who yell,

"Hey, Kool-Aid...!!!"

OH YEAHHHHH.....!!!!!!

That's all for now, gotta run.  Until we meet again, remember...

Keep it simple....See ya!

Calling All Dads! Calling All Dads!

This is a special post Fathers Day shout out to all the dads out there... Read and be blessed, and don't forget:  Keep it simple... Enjoy!

I hope all my fellow dads enjoyed Fathers Day weekend, and that you received all the love and appreciation you deserve. If you're going through a challenging time right now, whether because of circumstances you wish were better than they are, or you're challenged by people in your life who don't appreciate you for all that you do, keep your chin up and keep on keepin' on...

You can still win the race if you stay on track. Don't worry about critics who second guess your every move because they think they know better than you what you should do. Everyone remembers the hero, nobody knows the critic. Don't look to others to approve your every move, and don't beat yourself up if you make mistakes from time to time. Like your kids, you are also a work in progress. Errors pay in the long run, just ask the companies that put erasers on pencils.

Don't try to please everyone: the only perfect person that ever walked this earth was hated, so don't think everyone's going to like you, or agree with you, including loved ones. Just agree to disagree, be at peace with who you are, and keep it moving. People will talk about you on three occasions: the day you're born, the day you die, and every day in between, so what they say should make no difference regarding who you are, or what you do.

Most important of all, remember the ones who make it possible for you to be a dad...I know you're thinking about the moms, but I'm talking about the ones who look up to you, the ones who call you Dad...your KIDS!!! Don't be ashamed to show them all the love, affection and attention you feel for them from the heart, as often as you possibly can. You won't regret it, and they won't forget it. Don't take it lightly: they appreciate your attention more than you may realize. Don't put it off: time flies too fast for you to notice and before long that little one who looks up to you now may one day soon be able to look at you eye to eye. Put a solid foundation under their feet so they can stand tall.

If you can do this in the face of second guessing and criticism from people who may despise you and not understand what you're doing (and aren't entitled to an explanation, by the way) when you look back on those days, you'll be able to say to yourself, "I'M GLAD I DID," instead of "I WISH I HAD"...and your kids may remember you one day like this:

Enjoy your day, Dad, and be blessed...!

Hustle: Not An Act, But An Attitude

HUSTLE: 
- to move or work in a quick and energetic way
- to play a sport with a lot of energy and effort
- to convey forcibly or hurriedly
- to urge forward precipitately
- to obtain by energetic activity
- to sell or promote energetically and aggressively
- to make strenuous efforts to obtain especially money or business
- to play a game or sport in an alert or aggressive manner  

I remember playing Little League baseball when I was growing up. Those were some of the best memories of my childhood. I couldn't wait to get to the field and when it was time to go I hated the thought of leaving. But of all the experiences I had during those years, there is one that stands out: every single practice I went to, and every single game I played, I heard at least one of the coaches every day yelling at someone on the team to "Hustle..! Hustle out there! Get the lead out!" (or something along those lines) This happened when the coach thought one of us wasn't putting out as much effort as he thought we could have, or should have. More often than not, the kid being singled out by the coach really was doing his best. All the yelling wasn't going to make him run any faster or work any harder. It usually had the opposite effect; the kid would get discouraged and not knowing what else to do, he'd eventually quit.

Now I'm not going to bash on those coaches I had growing up because when I became a coach years later I did some of the very same things with the kids I taught. But I did notice something the kids I coached had in common with the kids I played alongside many years ago.  The ones that wanted to hustle did...the ones that didn't want to hustle did NOT. I realize that sounds obvious, but it really isn't. Let me explain.

There are two sets of players on every team: the ones that want to be on the team and the ones that don't. One set doesn't want to be there, they just go through the motions. They're no different than kids in a car on a long road trip who "Are we there yet?" every five minutes. They only show up because someone told them they had to be there; someone ordered, begged, whined, pleaded, threatened, even bribed the kids to get them to show up, but in truth, they really don't want to be bothered. They feel like they're wasting their time. They'd rather be somewhere else, doing something else, even if it means just sitting around watching movies, playing video games, watching paint dry...whatever. They go through the motions, but their body language says, "Are we done yet...???" Their attitude brings to mind a popular saying, one which I like to say a bit differently: "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him WANT to drink."

"A man convinced against his will is of the same opinion still." - Benjamin Franklin

By contrast, the ones that do want to be on the team are the ones who can't wait to get to the field, the ones who can't wait to get started, and they're the last ones to leave because they're having so much fun. You do not have to tell them to hustle, you have to tell them to slow down at times because they're borderline out of control, they're so excited. They've got the "no place else I'd rather be" attitude, and not surprisingly, they're the most fun to be around. They have an enthusiasm that's contagious, and a disposition that's sweeter than the icing on a cake.

You can find these kinds of people in every walk of life, not just sports. I've worked with people over the years who have displayed similar attitudes. If I have learned one thing from all I have observed it would be this:

Hustle is not an act, it's an attitude. You can't manufacture it, and you can't fake it. Either it's there or it's not. You cannot force anyone to hustle any more than you can drive a square peg into a round hole. Those who are forced against their will to do it will come to resent you for it, rebel against you, resist you and ultimately they will retreat from you. You cannot make someone do what is not already in their heart to do. What is in their heart will be sought out, will come out, and in the end will win out. Nothing you think you can do about the situation will change that.  Point blank, people have their own reasons for choosing the goals they pursue. They already have the incentive to get their hustle on; they don't need yours. If you want to see them hustle you need to find out which goals are important to them, then help them find the approach that works best for them to achieve their objectives...not yours.

Tap into their motives, their dreams, goals, desires to succeed, and you'll always see them hustle after what they want. If you want to push people's buttons properly, you will never have to worry about getting them to hustle if you keep their goals in sight. Tap into their motives, their desires to succeed, and you'll always see them hustle after what they want.

"You can have everything in life you want if you will just help other people get what they want." - Zig Ziglar

Help them tap into their desires. Keep their objectives in front of their eyes. Let them verbalize the dreams in their hearts, and encourage them to do so often. Do this and getting them to hustle will never be an issue. Most likely you will need to hustle in order to keep up.

That's all for now, gotta run...until we meet again, remember:

Keep it simple...See ya!

What It Really Means To Serve

"I appeal to you therefore, brethren, and beg of you in view of [all] the mercies of God, to make a decisive dedication of your bodies [presenting all your members and faculties] as a living sacrifice, holy (devoted, consecrated) and well pleasing to God, which is your reasonable (rational, intelligent) service and spiritual worship." - Romans 12:1 AMP

SERVICE: 
- help, use, benefit
- contribution to the welfare of others
- the act of serving as a helpful act, or useful labor that does not produce a tangible commodity
- to provide (someone) with something that is needed or wanted

"Everybody can be great...because anybody can serve. You don't have to have a college degree to serve. You don't have to make your subject and verb agree to serve. You only need a heart full of grace. A soul generated by love." - Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.   

For many years I had no idea what service meant. I thought it meant doing something I didn't want to do, that someone had to force me, trick me, manipulate me into doing it against my will. There was nothing I could say or do about it one way or the other. I felt obligated, so I did as I was told with a sense of duty and a feeling of drudgery attached to it. I thought serving others meant I had to pretend to be somebody I was not.  I thought I had to let people control me, walk all over me, and I had to pretend it was okay, knowing deep in my heart of hearts that it wasn't. I resented being treated that way; I hated it with a passion but could do nothing about it, that's just the way things were. So I had to suck it up and deal; it was what it was. I know that isn't what some people want to hear, but I have to be honest. I didn't like it one bit.

As it turns out what I was doing had nothing to do with service at all. I was being manipulated through fear and guilt into doing things for others that they should have been doing for themselves. They asked me to do things for them that they were perfectly capable of doing, they just chose not to do so. Why do it yourself when you can get somebody to do it for you? It's so much easier, they reasoned. What I wanted to do didn't matter, I had no say, I should just shut up and do as I was told without asking any questions because they said so. I resented it bitterly because I felt violated. Used. Like a puppet on a string.

With the passing of time I discovered, much to my relief, that the meaning of service is far different than what I had been taught years ago. I learned that service is a voluntary expression of your genuine self, from the depths of your being. Service is an act of your free will that allows you to bless others and receive blessings in return; as you give, you receive. Service has a built in sense of peace and purpose that nothing else can match. Service has nothing to do with making yourself look good in the eyes of others, making yourself look good at the expense of others, or giving others a false impression that you are superior to the people who receive your helping hand. You offer value to another person because you see that person as valuable, and in so doing both giver and receiver are lifted up.

It is only when you serve another from the heart that you can truly be yourself, express yourself. Rather than drudgery there is joy in the act of serving, because you are sharing your true self with others, offering to others the fullest expression of the value you possess, and in kind receiving in your heart the peace that passes understanding when you reach out to aid your fellow man at a time when it is needed most.

And best of all, service is what you make it; it's your choice, not someone else's. It doesn't matter if anyone agrees with what you do, who you do it for, or why you do it. What you do to serve is not about them, it's about you and the people who receive the benefit from your acts of service. So if someone disagrees with what you're doing it doesn't matter because you don't need their approval. They can judge and criticize all they want; chances are they aren't doing anything worthy of notice, so what they have to say doesn't carry any weight anyway.

Remember that the next time someone tries to tell you what you're doing is wrong. Listen carefully, because they may really be saying, I don't do that, or I wouldn't do that if I were you.  Settle the matter in your own heart, make peace with your decision, knowing it is yours alone to make, and then do what you know in your heart to be right. And don't concern yourself with people who question your motives:

"For you see, in the end, it is between you and God...
It was never between you and them, anyway..."  - Mother Teresa

That's all for now, gotta run.  Until we meet again, remember:

Keep it simple...See ya!

Do People Bask In Your Glow, Or Shield From Your Glare?

GLARE: to shine with a harsh, uncomfortably brilliant light; to look directly at someone in an angry way...

GLOW: to shine with low light and heat but usually without flame; to shine with a steady light

Have you ever noticed how people have a tougher time looking at the sun than the moon? Wearing shades (sunglasses) makes little difference; the rays are too strong. The only time of day you can look at the sun with no fear of harming your eyes would be early morning or late evening: sunrise and sunset. Why? Because the sun's rays don't glare at that time of day, they glow. The light seen at that time is similar to moonlight: soft, warm, inviting...attractive. Think about it: when was the last time you heard of someone being turned off by moonlight, by candlelight...

...or even the crackle of logs in a fireplace?

Chances are, you haven't. There's nothing about a soft glowing light that turns people off. But there is plenty about a harsh glare that does. It's uncomfortable, overbearing, overwhelming. People have trouble adjusting to it, and will do whatever they can to avoid it. Consider this the next time you want to speak with someone about an idea you'd like to share, or an opportunity you'd like to present. What does the difference between a glare and a glow have to do with speaking to people, you ask? In a word...plenty...or if you want to drag out the syllables a bit: puh-LEN-ty.

Simply put, nobody likes a conversation that makes them feel overwhelmed, smothered, suffocated. Neither do they like to feel manipulated or humiliated, as if they've been painted into a corner from which there is no escape. It's like giving someone a cup of water by filling it with a fire hose. Yes it's more powerful, and the water will fill the cup more quickly, but it will happen TOO quickly for most people to handle. As thirsty as they may be, they'll head for the hills because they can't handle what you're giving them. It's way too much, way too soon.

Compare that with someone who fills a cup of water for them to drink from a pitcher instead of a hose. It's something they can handle at their own pace, it gives them what they need, and if they want more, they can come back and get as much as they want, when THEY'RE ready to drink. But it won't happen so long as we're trying to cram it down their throats because we're in such a hurry for them to have it, no matter how much we think they need what we have to offer.

The sun's glare is intense, intimidating. By contrast the sun's glow is inviting. So is the glow of moonlight, of candlelight, and the light of the fireplace...warm, calming, even soothing. It puts people at ease, it turns them on rather than turning them off, invites them to come closer and enjoy more of what they're experiencing. But here's the question you need to answer: when talking with people, what do you want them to remember most about the conversation? The glow of a warm, friendly, engaging encounter that encourages them, making them feel right at home? Or a harsh glare that's overbearing, intimidating, manipulative, and suffocating... even pushy?

Think carefully. Your answer may determine whether more people rejoice at your presence:

Or your absence:

That's all for now, gotta run.  Until we meet again, remember....

Keep it simple...See ya!

Make Someone Smile

It is said that a smile, like love, is something you can give away yet it will never diminish. A smile is like a virus in that it is highly contagious, but you've never heard of anyone getting sick from catching a smile. A smile says to others, I am secure enough in myself to share the joy with you that resides in my heart. I'm okay, and I think you're okay, too. A smile tells others that they're valuable, worthy of attention, love, and respect. A smile says you don't have to prove to me how valuable you are, because I already see you as valuable; I believe in you, I believe the best of you, and I wish the best for you.

And talk about communicating value? A smile says to others, I think you're important, and that it's worth my while to share with you my very best. As I recall the greeting card company Hallmark made their mark with the slogan, "When you care enough to send the very best." A genuine smile to others is your very best. Everything else you bring to the table is icing on the cake.

Wherever you go, be sure to bring your smile with you. It's the one thing you can flash in public without being arrested for indecent exposure...assuming you brushed your teeth, that is.... LOL

Make someone smile and hopefully they'll smile back. Who knows? You might even do for someone what this guy did for Clint Eastwood:

That's all for now, gotta run.  Until we meet again, remember...

Keep it simple..... See ya!

Do You Know Your Networking ABC's...?

"A, B, C...
It's easy as 1,2,3...
And simple as Do Re Mi,
A, B,C...1,2,3,
Baby you and me, girl..."

Those are words to a familiar chorus heard by many kids who grew up in my generation back in the 60's and 70's, made popular by a group called the Jackson 5: Jackie, Tito, Jermaine, Marlon, and of course, Michael. Now I admit to not knowing all the words (not many of us did, nor did we care; we just liked the song). I do recall that they were singing about the simplicity of love and romance, but more to the point, they sang about the importance of relating to others. What they sang about so many years ago is still important today, knowing your ABC's...

A is ADD Value

Everybody who walks this earth has the ability to make a positive difference in the lives of other people. Unfortunately, not everybody is willing to do so, either because they don't believe they are capable, or it could be that they don't realize how much power they possess. Truth is, you'll never find out what you can do for others until you reach out to others:

"A life is not important except in its impact on other lives." - Jackie Robinson

B is BUILD relationships

"The generous soul will be made rich, and he who waters will also be watered himself." - Proverbs 11:25 NKJV

"A man who has friends must himself be friendly..." - Proverbs 18:24 NKJV

As the saying goes, no man is an island. We cannot relate to others until we reach out to others. In fact, a relationship cannot be built until a relationship is started.  You may be reluctant to reach out for fear of being hurt. That's understandable, but you must realize this is one of the risks of life. On the flip side, you must consider that there is no reward without risk, just as there is no capacity for hurt without a corresponding capacity for healing.  Every coin has two sides. Everyone might not be your cup of tea (and vice versa), but there are enough people on the planet with whom you can share a sip.

C is CONNECT with others

C is closely related to B in that they work hand in hand, especially after you have reached out successfully to people with whom you share a like mind.  Finding common ground is important, as this will help strengthen the bonds you have forged.  Even when you have moments where you don't see eye to eye, you can still agree to disagree and share a sense of mutual respect for standing firm in the courage of your convictions. Doing so is a win-win situation, as you build confidence within yourself as well as your relationships with others.

As you continue the process, you will see that there is no perfect order, A, B, and C are intertwined. It does not matter which comes first or last, but you must realize all three facets are necessary and equally important in order to bond with like-minded people successfully. If it is true that your network is your net worth, then you can use this strategy to build strength in numbers for your life as you benefit the lives of others.

So,

ADD value...
BUILD relationships...
CONNECT with others...

And you will learn just as the Jackson 5 sang so many years ago, it really is:

A, B, C...
Easy as 1, 2, 3...
And simple as DO, RE, MI...
ABC...123...

But it starts with you and me...

That's all for now, gotta run.  Until we meet again, remember:

Keep it simple....See ya!