You Can't Buy "Street Cred"

"Let another man praise you, and not your own mouth; a stranger, and not your own lips." - Proverbs 27:2 AMP

MASQUERADE: a way of appearing or behaving that is not true or real; an action or appearance that is mere disguise or show

CREDIBILITY: the quality of being believed or accepted as being true, real, or honest; the quality or power of inspiring belief; capacity for belief

Have you ever heard the saying, "You never get a second chance to make a first impression"..? I know I've heard it many times, and I bet you have, too. On the surface it seems to make a lot of sense, because after all, it pays to put your best foot forward when you meet someone for the first time, right?

Well, the answer is yes...and no. Let me explain.

Making a good first impression can be beneficial in the long run...as long as you are genuine. In baseball it is said that the quality most appreciated in a good umpire is consistency; the decisions he makes in the first inning are the same in the ninth inning. So it is in life; people want to know you are the same person tomorrow that they see today. They don't like flakes, and they don't like fakes. Many people seek to impress with pretense, only to have it backfire on them. Nobody can play a fake role for very long without dropping their guard at some point. When that does happen, and people finally get to see who you really are, you will lose something very valuable in their eyes: TRUST. And trust is something that is hard to keep, easy to break, and once broken, difficult to repair. They no longer trust you to show them who you really are, because you did not trust them to make an accurate assessment of you, based on who you really are, not who you appear to be.

Why do so many people pretend to be someone they're not for the sake of impressing others? Because they fear rejection. They fear that if people saw the real man or woman behind the mask, they may not like what they see. Truth is, we cannot arrange our own credibility with others; we must let others establish it for us. We cannot build our own reputation with phoniness, but we can surely destroy it.

Ever heard of "social proof"..? It takes place in the dating scene and applies just as much in business as to personal relationships. Here's an example:

A man may have trouble finding a date, much less a woman who shows him any interest. Females avoid him like the plague because he seems unappealing. But let just one woman find something about him that is the least bit interesting, no matter how small it seems, something that makes her feel good about herself, and suddenly he has more female attention than he can handle, women competing so hard for the attention that they seem to be stalking him; before long they're invading his space so much that he has to beat them off with a stick. (a nice problem to have, some men might say)

The same thing happens with a woman who isn't noticed by most men. All it takes is one man to shower her with any amount of attention or affection, be it large or small, for any reason at all, then suddenly she has men competing for her attention who didn't care about her at all before.  Why? Because her value was established in the eyes of another man. She was seen as a person worth getting to know better. And she didn't have to do anything to make it happen, other than letting people see her genuine self. No more, no less.

So what am I saying here? Simply this: if you want to make a good impression on people, whether it's the first one, the next one, or the all-important lasting one, the way to put your best foot forward is to be yourself. Don't worry about what others think, and don't pretend to be someone you're not. Be your own person, and trust the people you meet to make their own assessments about you, good, bad, or indifferent.

Don't brag about how good you think you are to others. Nobody likes a braggart, and even if what you say is true, you will turn people off by your overabundant display of self-importance and conceit. A haughty attitude never helps, and a humble spirit never hurts. Let others see that you are comfortable with yourself just as you are, even when you make the occasional mistake. People will relate best to those who help them to become comfortable with themselves, for better or worse.

Be real with people. Be genuine, don't be fake. Let people decide for themselves who you are in their eyes. Trust that they will see you at your authentic best, and when the dust settles, you will have won a most precious prize:

RESPECT:  a feeling of admiring someone or something that is good, valuable, important, etc.; a feeling or understanding that someone or something is important, serious, etc., and should be treated in an appropriate way; a high or special regard: ESTEEM

...and in the long run, that is the best "street cred" of all...

That's all for now, gotta run.  Until we meet again, remember:

Keep it simple...See ya! 

Champions Keep Going

"And let us not lose heart and grow weary and faint in acting nobly and doing right, for in due time and at the appointed season we shall reap, if we do not relax our courage and faint." - Galatians 6:9 AMP

CHAMPION: WARRIOR (a person who fights in battles and is known for having courage and skill); FIGHTER (someone who does not give up: someone who continues fighting or trying);one that does battle for another's rights or honor;a winner of first prize or first place in a competition, also: one who shows marked superiority

There will be days when you wake up in the morning, and instead of having boundless energy, you sense you are in a fog. Instead of being ready to take on the day, you feel as if you were ambushed in your sleep. Your mind and emotions are clouded with doubt and uncertainty. You question your decisions, and second guess your motives. You wonder if what you are doing is worth the struggle you're going through, especially when your plans aren't coming into focus as fast as you expected. And worse, deep in your heart you fear that all the lazy critics and naysayers, the ones who would not support you, the ones who questioned your sanity in the first place for taking on this challenge instead of being lulled to sleep by the so-called "safe and easy" path of comfort, convenience and security they chose for themselves, may have been right after all.

If you read any of this and you can honestly say, "Yeah, that's me," or you have been all alone with your thoughts, plagued with doubt about your confidence, your competence, your ability to succeed, if you find yourself half way up the mountain to your goal, wondering in a fit of anxiety, frustration, fatigue, or even rage, if what you're going through is worth it, or if you are wasting your time, then my friend, I have two words for you...

Keep going.  

You heard me. I said...KEEP GOING.

The path to your goal includes walking through the valley of the shadow of doubt, death, and indecision. You are not meant to set up camp and have a pity party, but to find a way to forge ahead when mentally and emotionally you seem to be running on fumes.

"Champions find a way to keep going when there's nothing left in their tank." (Eric Thomas) 

There has to be a reason greater than you to make one more move, take one more step. There must be something, or better yet, something in your life who inspires you to keep going, someone who ignites your will to press on, because you can't bear the thought of disappointing them. 

Pro Football Hall of Fame player and former college coach Bill Curry speaks often of his playing days with championship teams like the Green Bay Packers and the Baltimore Colts, days when he wanted to quit because he didn't feel like getting hammered over and over again by the opponent on the other side of the ball. He said it was during these moments he would look to his left and his right where he saw teammates who were willing to take that same punishment for him, and for the rest of the team. When he saw this dedication on the part of his teammates, he said within himself, "I can't let them down," so he endured another play, another series, another quarter, another game in his illustrious career, all because he saw a goal at the end that was bigger than himself, a prize that was greater than the pain he faced during the course of each game he played.

So it must be with all of us. There must be a prize in our lives that outweighs the pain. In sports there is a saying, "Losing hurts worse than winning feels good." We all must find our own reason to push through, to keep going, to press beyond the point where the pain of losing, quitting, giving up, ever becomes a comfortable option. The pain of discipline must always outweigh the pain of regret. 

We must find for ourselves a special something, or someone, about whom we can say, "I can't let them down, because they're counting on me." We must find our own reason to keep going when we have nothing left in our tanks, when our mental, emotional, and spiritual reserves have long reached the "E" mark. We must do this because there is a reason for us that keeps us so motivated, so focused, and so inspired, we know the answer in such a way that the question never becomes an issue. In fact, we forget what the question is. 

Find your reason, and remember it often. Keep it in front of your eyes. Let it put the pep in your step, the wind in your sails. And should a moment of doubt ever threaten to creep into your mind again, just pull this weapon out of your arsenal and obliterate all traces of uncertainty, as well as the fear which tries to sneak up on you in disguise.

You're a champion, never forget it.  Press on, keep going, stay focused, and in due time, the prize you seek will be yours.

That's all for now, gotta run.  Be blessed, not stressed. And until we meet again, remember...

Keep it simple...  See ya!